Because apparently the Internet is ten years behind in England, Lindsay Lohan was cast in a play on London's West End over the summer.
Though she was a little shaky at first (Lindsay forgot her lines and drew unintentional laughs from the crowd on opening night), LiLo has reportedly settled into her role as a ditzy Hollywood social-climber in David Mamet's Speed the Plow.
Not a huge stretch acting-wise, but hey, she's holding down a job, which is more than we can say for most sociopathic junkies.
Well, she was anyway. Lindsay claimed she was "too ill" to perform yesterday, but her social media accounts tell a different tale.
"Sorry everyone but I'm too ill to perform and down for the count," Lindsay tweeted before missing a matinee performance on Wednesday.
The day before, of course, she was out and about in London, snapping selfies.
We'd say maybe she came down with something suddenly overnight, if it weren't for the fact that she miraculously recovered in time for Wednesday's evening performance, then promptly deleted the business about being sick from her Twitter account.
Sounds like to us like Linds was busted for being hungover and told by producers to get her ass to the evening performance or suffer the consequences.
Sigh...so few things are consistent in this world. In a way, it's comforting to know Linds will never change.